Bereolaesque: Once and for All…

gentlewoman 2 webThere’s something romantic about words. You play with them, allowing them space to dance within your mind. You construct them to your liking until selflessly giving away to your listener for access, interpretation and thought. They drip on pondering ears and take on a life of their own. You can progress a nation or summon an army with a couple quick thrusts of your tongue. Taking full control over words can mean the difference between poor or rich, hopeless or ebullient and death or life.

I get it, I get it, I swear that I get it! We live in a texting, typing and less talking generation. We know that already. I won’t complain about this generation. I accept them and embrace their cool impact on society. But there’s just nothing cool about super bad grammar.

Text messaging tortures grammar. People are typing like they talk. They’re using words incorrectly and embarrassing themselves all over the internet. Reading most incoming messages is like solving a word scramble puzzle. These devices have spell-check, but they don’t have a stupid-check. Of course, nothing is perfect and errors are often overlooked. It happens to me. However, I’ve noticed much of this generation simply doesn’t understand the correct use of the English language. Perhaps they learned how to type by texting. I learned in a classroom.

You don’t want the grammar police monitoring your every word and correcting each error every time you speak, but excessive abuse of your language requires some damn correction once and for all:

  • If you use “For all intensive purposes” in an argument, you just lost that argument. Put your guard down and pick your dictionary up.
  • We appreciate your appreciation, but “congrads” isn’t a word.
  • All losses are tragic–especially followed by the phrase, “Sorry for your lost.”
  • If someone needs clarification and asks you to be more “Pacific,” kindly direct that person to the ocean…and tell that person to jump.
  • If you say “a lot” a lot, make sure you don’t spell it “alot.”
  • If a person wishes you a “Happy New Years,” ask which years.
  • You shouldn’t date anyone who wishes you a happy Valentime’s Day…you just shouldn’t.
  • “Weather” is rain and sunshine and all that – “Whether” isn’t.
  • Your = possession/shows ownership.  You’re = contraction of “You are.”
  • There = place or idea.  Their = possession/shows ownership. They’re = contraction of They are.
  • Its = possession/shows ownership. It’s = contraction for It is or It has

There’s something satisfying about receiving a text message with correct grammar and punctuation. It’s not necessary, but it says something about the sender. Unless you’re between the ages of three and five years old, speaking in text/Twitter talk in real life is a tragedy, LOL.

#Pleasantries.

– Enitan Bereola, II

Bereola’s latest bestselling book, “GENTLEWOMAN: Etiquette for a Lady, from a Gentleman has been met with critical acclaim. He’s also the author of another award-winning bestseller, “BEREOLAESQUE: The Contemporary Gentleman & Etiquette book for the Urban Sophisticate.” Bereola is a celebrity ghostwriter, columnist, public speaker and etiquette impresario. Visit: Bereolaesque.com, Twitter & Facebook for more info and follow him on Instagram @bereolaesque.

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