Do We Really Need To Change Who We Are?

There are no reservations about who we are.  We have qualities we like, and some….well, not so much.  But we can change those. To start, there are constant reminders, sayings, and even books telling us how each of us can change.  

But is change really our walk in a positive direction, or is that simply what it is–just a change?  All we absolutely know about change is that it is different, but different doesn’t always mean good.

Yes, quitting smoking and eating healthy are always positive changes, but what about your character?  What happens when you try to change who you are in hopes of becoming someone “better”?

I have always been a loud opinionated person, and it’s led to ruffling a few feathers.  I have gone through the notions of trying to change that about myself.  Although some may see it as a sign of maturity, I have to respectfully disagree.

In my eyes, all I’ve done is shut my mouth, and it’s not who I am.  I was given a voice to express myself.  I will admit I envy those who seem so refined and poised, but I think (and it’s just my opinion) that those people may desire a bit of my free spirit as well.

I personally don’t think change, especially when forced, is good.  Yes, we should always evolve and try things that we are not comfortable with in order to move on to the next phase in our lives.  However, trying to change who we are in order to become something “more agreeable” is just not part of that package.

Consenting to a popular opinion or biting your tongue simply because you don’t want to deal with confrontation is utterly ridiculous.  We’re special because we’re unique, in every way, and our opinions hold just as much weight as anyone else’s.  If we can’t back up what we say, then perhaps we’ll learn something new in the end, but a fear of being wrong or challenged should never be the reason.

It’s a stigma I’ve fought to rid myself of as well.  In this case, I made the wrong change to conform, and that’s not okay.  I had to find myself again and just believe no matter how passionately someone speaks on a topic, the things that I say (despite the fact it’s different) matter, too.

Nothing, and I do mean nothing, in this world is one-sided.

It’s a beautiful thing to be the change you want to see in this world, but only if you do it with the true essence of your soul.

–Zoey Flowers

Zoey Flowers is a shamelessly eclectic, music-loving, zen-meditating freelance journalist.  She has written for major magazines and online publications about Hip-Hop, Holistic Lifestyles, Technology, and the Music Industry.  For more articles, check Zoey at or follow her on Twitter @ZoeyFlowers.



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